Positively Blue: November 2010

The past few days have been quite difficult for me and my family. My beloved grandmother passed away on Sunday. My Mama Jeanne. I still can not believe it. It seems so surreal. She had been very sick for a couple of months, and had been struggling with a few different things over the past several years, but now she is healed. No more sorrow, no more pain. She stands hand in hand with my granddaddy now in Heaven, singing praises to our glorious Lord.

My grandmother was a remarkable woman. She was strong, so very strong. She married my granddaddy at the age of fifteen and together they worked hard, side by side, on their dairy farm in Tennessee. Much later in life my granddaddy developed Alzheimer's, and Mama Jeanne remained faithful and strong. She stood by his side and cared for him for the next fifteen years until he passed away in 2005. Now they are together again.

Mama Jeanne loved the Lord more than life itself, and it showed. She always had a positive attitude about everything, and wanted nothing in life but to praise His name and share His love with others, which she did. We recently learned that she had written many songs, praises, and poems over the years, a talent my mom didn't even know she had. She had written a poem in 1976 about her salvation, and it was read at the funeral yesterday. Beautiful words about love and forgiveness. Mama Jeanne loved to sing and dance, her favorite thing in life was to worship God. She was a vision of the Fruit of the Spirit. Galatians 5:22-23 reads,

"But the Fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law."

Mama Jeanne truly possessed each of those attributes. She was incredibly loving and always had joy and peace in her heart. She was patient with everyone she encountered and always showed self-control. I've never known anyone as kind and gentle as my Mama Jeanne. A couple of days ago, while remembering all of these wonderful gifts, and memories that we had shared with Mama Jeanne, my sister commented that ultimately her heart had given out because she gave so much of it away. Mama Jeanne poured her heart into her faith, family and friends, and I aspire to live a life as a reflection of her.

She was the epitome of a perfect grandmother. I remember as a little girl visiting Mama Jeanne and Granddaddy being absolutely thrilled to be with them. My brother, sister, and I would color and draw pictures to hang on the refrigerator(all of which she kept and we found in a box recently), we played board games, watched movies, and helped in the garden. I used to play "Grocery Store" with Mama Jeanne in the kitchen. She and my dad both worked at Kroger at the time, so I wanted to play too. I would get different items out of the pantry and set them up on the shelves, price them, and pretend to buy them. I would help Mama Jeanne make her famous Chocolate and Biscuit, a recipe that has been passed down to my mom, sister, and me, and is my favorite meal. She would make homemade biscuits, and I got to flatten the dough and cut out the circles. My favorite part though was eating the leftover dough! Mama Jeanne also made the best fried chicken, banana pudding, and chocolate pie. I have yet to eat another pie that was better. I also remember sitting in a chair next to granddaddy sipping coffee together, except I would dunk graham crackers in mine(delicious, you should try it). Mama Jeanne used to read Pocahontas to me, and if I left my doll at home she made one out of a hand towel. She rolled it up, tied a rubber band around the top quarter and drew a face... Ragdoll. Christmas was her favorite time of year. She seemed to have the best Christmas tree and best ornaments ever. When I was still small, I would crawl under the tree and play with the different ornaments, the Little Drummer Boy, the mice, the baskets(used as an elevator system), and my other toys. I have so many memories of her and have been so blessed. I couldn't have asked for a better grandmother.

It's extremely difficult to write a summary of the life of such an amazing woman. This has been but a small glimpse of the love that I have received from my Mama Jeanne. So as I sit here in my room, with the sweet smell of flowers, from her funeral, filling the air, I am reminded of the gentle, sweet person that she was and I hope with all of my heart that I can become such a loving, kind, faithful, and Godly woman like her. Her legacy of love and compassion for others lives on and I pray that I am a reflection of that.